Corny Jokes

• A rabbi, a minister, and a priest walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"
  
  
• A guy walks into a bar and orders 3 beers. Instead of drinking one at a time, he takes one sip at a time from each of the glasses. The bartender asks him why he's doing this, and the guy tells him that he had two brothers that moved away, and they always used to go out and drink with each other. They promised to do this as a ritual. After a while, the guy becomes a regular at the bar, and does the same thing every time he goes. One day, he only orders 2 beers, so everyone thinks the worst; that one of his brothers died. The bartender goes over to him to offer his condolances. The guy tells him, "No, nobody died. I just decided to stop drinking."
  
  
• An American, a Mexican, and a Newfie (a person from Newfoundland) are being chased by a monster. They duck into an alley, where they find a cardboard box, a trash can, and a potato sack. The american jumps into the box, the Mexican jumps into the trash can, and the Newfie jumps into the potato sack. The moster comes into the alley and looks inside the cardboard box. The American guy goes, "Woof woof!" The monster says, "Oh, it's just a dog." He looks in the trash can, and the Mexican guy goes, "Meow, meow!", so the monster says, "Oh, it's just a cat." He turns towards the potatoe sack, and the Newfie goes, "Potato"
  
  
• One day, there is a flash flood in a small town on a river. The town is just a little down river from a dam that's gonna break and the rest of the water is gonna destroy everything in its path. The water has reached near the roofs of the houses, and everyone in the town has evacuated. However, there is one guy standing on the roof of his house, refusing to leave. A rescue boat comes up, and one of the rescue workers tells the guy, "Hurry up! Get in before the dam breaks!" the guy says, "No. God will save me." 5 minutes later, the same boat comes by, and the same worker says, "Come on! Just get in!!" Again, the man replies, "No. God will save me." A few minutes later, the boat comes again, and the worker says, "Get in! The dam is about to break!", and once again, the man says, "No. God will save me." The dam breaks, and the guy dies. He goes to heaven, and he asks god, "Why didn't you save me?" God tells him, "I did. I sent you that boat three times!!"

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